Road tripping

A few years ago, I had a very weird dream. And it went like this:

I woke up to the usual annoying ring of my alarm. And out of habit, I snoozed it. It rang again. I shut it off while mentally cursing its existance. Yet, being vaguely aware that if I didnt get my sorry ass off the bed, I did better have a darn good excuse as to why I wasnt already eating my breakfast in the dining room. So I woke. And everything fell into motion after that. I didnt even have to think. In a daze, I went to the toilet. Dressed. Breakfasted. Caught the bus. Went through some old deary perhimpunan. Got herded off to class. Sat down at my seat and stared at the clock overhanging the blackboard. Waiting for time to tick by.


Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick
 Said the clock.

 And then I woke up. Again, I find myself snoozing the alarm. Then cursing it before going on doing exactly the same thing: the toilet, the dressing, the breakfast, the bus, the perhimpunan, the chair and the clock. This time, I actually saw the teacher come in stony faced.

 Then, zap! Suddenly I heard the alarm go off. AGAIN. Of course, I was in bed. AGAIN. and the whole thing just reenacted itself AGAIN. This time, it got as far as the teacher saying that she was going to teach something out of the textbook. A new chapter I think. Not that I'd remember...

 Then suddenly I heard a bell going off.
 "eh recess so fast already?! No.. maybe its a fire drill. Woohooo no class!" I thought...

before waking up.

This time, what I did was: I snoozed my alarm clock, stared at the ceiling board for the longest time. And asked myself "Is this real this time??" I went as far as pinching myself on the arm. It hurt. Bad idea.

"Okay" I sighed in relief "....so this is the real deal"

Then suddenly, I realised. I felt extremely tired. Really exhausted. And rather infuriated at myself for being blessed with such a malfunctional imagination. One that weaves extremely shitty dreams that causes people to feel tired even after a whole nights' rest.

And as you all can guess, I skipped school that day.
haha. Come on, cut me some slack, I went to school 3 times that day already okay??!
.. in my head.

Why am I telling you this?
Cause I have a nagging feeling that I seem to be going around in circles alot recently. Kinda like that twisted dream I just related to you. Again and again, I find myself doing the same things. Stuck again in the same issues that wont go away. Heck, even the people who fuck up my life are the same. Why though?

I try to pinch myself.
Ouch.

And then I think:
"this IS the real deal."

Shit.

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