Saturday, March 31, 2007

MBDC memories

Its over. The three weeks of running around in formal wear and sissy shoes. The tiredness. The aching ankles. The transparencies.

All is left is precious memories of the rollercoaster ride. And a dreadful combination of cough, flu and fever. But still, despite everything, it was all worth it. The experience gained is priceless, the people I met are probably the most dedicated and most hardworking of the all. you guys are indeed the creme de la creme to me you know that? Not many people can endure so much without morphing into whiny bitches

Ironic fact is that despite running around asking people to donate blood, I cant donate this time. I've tried to resist panadol so I could be able to donate. Yet, the fever was to much to endure and panadol became my instant savior. Thus, eliminating any chances of me donating this time. Hopefully, I will be more healthier next time.

Thank you for the people who were concerned about me. Yeah, thanks for asking me how I was when I wasnt feeling well. And thanks for a particular person who helped me lend an umbrella, walked me home in the rain AND then returned to college hall to return the umbrella to the owner before driving home. Thanks.

And thank you to all the 1650 people who came. And no thank you to the blackout that happened on tues, causing us to cancel.

MBDC is over.
Now all I need to do is just focus on my studies and score well.
Easier said then done.
Wish me well.

Random pics:


weird ritualistic dance


umm...


testing for bad breath


the dancing mascots


informal group picture

posted by hiddenmcky at 10:44 AM 2 comments

Wednesday, March 28, 2007



Appreciate them. The people around you

Appreciation. A bloody long word with a simple message: That is to be grateful and thankful to a person. Sounds simple no?

Then again, the simplest things always seem so much more confusing than even the most complex things. Have we all become so complex like what aimee said that simple ideas just completely eludes our understanding?

A read something today that made me wake up to the fact that I've been committing one of the worst crimes that a friend can do. So caught up in my business, affairs, worries,insecurities and whateverthefuck I have on my mind these several weeks, I've been neglecting my friends.

Although I have been under some pressure these few weeks thus causing me to be tired and act outta character sometimes, I am glad you all have been silently supporting, helping and guiding me. Thank you guys for being such rocks. Even when the sun refuses to shine in my world, I know you all will always be there with torch lights and cartons of triple A batteries =)

To the friends who lend me a hand when I ran campaigning, thank you.
Thank you for waking up at 6 am everyday, even on the days when you had no class,to arrive earlier than me so that you can help me.
Thank you for not blaming me for making you fall sick.
Thank you for running around the college with me.
Thank you for consoling me when things get tough.

To my classmates, sorry.
Sorry for not being there when you need me.
Sorry for not having lunch with you all since 6364862 days.
Sorry for my frequent disappearances.
Sorry for turning down invitations to go out.
And thank you for being so understanding.

To close friends,
We have disagreements sometimes, cause we are different people with different views, opinions, motives and experience. Thanks for smiling at me even when I was frowning at you. XD

To my old friends,
Thanks for caring about me eventhough we had not met like several centuries. And sorry for missing out on the latest outing you all had lar. especially to xin ying cause I know you tried so hard to make sure all of us arrived. Sumimazen!

To everyone, although it might slip this mind of mine to thank you when the timing is appropriate, please understand that I really do appreciate you all and yes, I do care. I just dont show it too much sometimes.

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posted by hiddenmcky at 12:34 AM 1 comments

Sunday, March 25, 2007



Running around in formal wear and sissy shoes
Campaigning for a good cause

When I was handed the post as one of the campaign managers for the coming blood donation campaign (BDC), my initial reaction was "WTFFFFFF!!!"

Okay, so I exaggerated. Point is, I wasnt over the moon.
Accepted it I did anyway.

So with the acceptance comes me running around tarc in formal wear and sissy shoes EVERYDAY for two weeks straight, much to the amusement of my classmates who started calling me 'formal tai cheh'.And its not over yet. Just most of it is anyway. Cause campaigning will still continue next week along with BDC. No daniel, I was not the one wearing the mascot omg!

BUT still, got reason to rejoice la wei!
I am done running around from one lecture hall to another!

Campaigning. What is it?
Erm. Technically all I do is run around college, disturb lectures and try to pujuk the students to donate blood.

It was tiring and rather intimidating, freaky and every word that is a synonym to intimidating/freaky and tiring. So yeah, it was one of the reasons why I am so moody recently.Like when facing the 400+ students in DKC the first time. The first glance across the hall got me dizzy. Yet, I survived. And yeah, I think I got over the fear of public speaking. I think.

Campaigning was tiring,freaky,intimidating,yet it is also very fun at times,considering the oddities and the things I have faced during this past week. Let's see..

About lecturers
Senario 1
Several lecturers told me to to make it fast. One even told me to wrap it up in a minute! Normally,I dont give a damn and talked at normal speed(which was pretty fast as well). When I was done, and was in the process of passing the microphone back to the lecturer, they told me "wah, that WAS FAST!" -.-'''

Senario 2
When I was halfway explaining some points to the year 2 counselling students regarding gays not being able to donate blood, the lecturer interjected with a question "why are YOU discriminating gays?". She said it with a passion. She said it with a glare. Then proceeded a short debate between me and her in front of her students.(much to the amusement of the students la, they get a longer break and some drama) Thankfully, she was happy with my explaination in the end.

But then again, some lecturers were so nice. They actually helped me!! There was one lecturer who told his students that if they donated blood this BDC, he would reward them with extra courseworks marks. So nice! Then there was one who gave me all the time I could so that her students can ask questions. =) Who said tarc dont have good lecturers? Some of them ROCK MY SOCKS OFF!!

About students
Senario 1
I remember this freaky person who was sitting in the front row of the lecture hall from marketing course who was FILMING me. Okay, taking photos is normal since almost all tarc students know about the BDC, but filming??! All I could do was to keep my composure,smile and try not to send the microphone flying at said person.

Senario 2
I have come to a conclusion about SOT guys. They are all wolves I tell you. The minute me or yenn feng or alyse enter their class, they start whistling. It's not flattering. Its SCARY.

About the questions
I have all kinds of questions thrown at me. Here are some classic ones.

"Can those who had sex before donate?" (Yes my dears)
"Can those with low blood pressure donate?" (check with the doctor to see the readings is high enough)
"Can donate more than once in 3 months?" (no, only after 3 months)
"Does it hurt?" (like an injection)
"Can I have your phone number?" (Yeah, no kidding.)

This experience is also rewarding as well. Although I get absolutely NOTHING in terms of possession except for a sijil from doing all this running around, I feel happy that at least for once in my life, I am actually doing something that might change someone's life for the better.

When the times get trying sometimes, and I feel like this miniscule grain of sand in the sahara desert, I console and tell myself that


Despite all the aching on my ankles,
Despite all the time I had to sacrifice from being with my classmates during in between class breaks,
Despite having a super packed timetable,
Despite all the worries, the fears and the insecurities...


I am for once doing something right.
Not for myself.
But for the better good of someone else.

I know this post is long. If you have reached this point without skipping a word, kudos! You are forever adored by me and shall not be cursed upon picking coconuts for a living.

Tarcians who are reading this. Remember that you could make a difference next week. Donate Blood man!

Date: 26-30 march (this week monday to friday)
Venue: college hall
Time: 9 am- 5 pm

Those who wanna come, please tell me when you will be at the college hall and I'll try to be there to make sure the sexy nurses isnt ill treating you. =P =P

posted by hiddenmcky at 5:12 AM 5 comments

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Waking up

Today, I skipped an hour's lecture because I simply couldnt take the lecturer's way of teaching-one powerpoint slide per hour.Yup, It was THAT SLOW. Anyway, I was walking home alone and was so totally engrossed in my own thoughts, I failed to hear one of my friends calling my name. It was only when he practically SHOUTED my name at my face when I finally woke up from my daze.

Shocked and dazed, I shot a smile at him and mumbled a hi.

This lead me to think,perhaps I am so caught up with my own problems that I just fail to see that I am actually quite blessed. AND yes, there are people actually who actually care about me.

I woke up from getting hurt from being lied to. From having huge gigantic secrets being withheld from me. I woke up from thinking that I can control most of the things in my life. Things which are beyond my control,my abilities. I woke up understanding that I am human. That it is ok to get hurt. To hurt others. To hate. To love. To like. and to dislike.I woke up today.

I still have more waking up to do.
Cause I am not perfect.
and that I am human.

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posted by hiddenmcky at 4:41 PM 2 comments


Of Camwhoring males and birthday parties

This entry is going to be a no brainer and full of camwhoring antics.
Please do not scroll down if you have a weak heart.

Thank you.

Long gone were the days when girls love taking pictures. Thus coining the term 'camwhores'. Guys nowadays are equally addicted to it as well. So does the term camwhoring still apply? or do you call the practice as campimping?? =p

I have a friend whose birthday fell on the 20th march.
Due to some technical problems, we celebrated it a day late!! haha! Talk about surprises. He was then kidnapped from his house in shorts and a tee to join us in kfc carrefour. biggest Kfc I seen so far in KL



HAPPY BIRTHDAY JIA QUAN!!
You dont look 20 seriously!

Pictures!


With us girls. Other guys all bloody envious.


The cake was good man!
Candy jie and me trying our best to look as yummy as the cake..haha!


I like taking pictures of people camwhoring.
In attempts to filter all the camwhoring around him, chee ming has decided to focus his attention on the ketchup bottles. May Wan just stare blankly at the mad bunch.


Wen Hao, me trying to balance on candy's lap and candy trying to act like I weigh like a feather.


Ka Cheng's perchance for acting cute is rather....infectious.


Happy people.


Pick one =p
You get what I mean?? They are just as bad.. perhaps even worst!!

posted by hiddenmcky at 4:32 PM 2 comments

Tuesday, March 20, 2007


Is to NOT live by the rules sometimes.

Vyonne lent this book to me yesterday. Yes, I know it's corny but something about the simplicity of the cover and the title seemed to catch my interest. Such a complicated topic with such a simple cover? Ironic as it seemed, it somehow gave me a glimmer of hope that perhaps that life could be as simple as that book cover.

But the truth is : LIFE IS NOT SIMPLE. It never was to begin with and never will.

-------------------------------------------

The corny title aside, this book is pretty interesting. And yes, it does make sense.
Like one of the thing written in this book says "keeping it under your hat"

The author said something about keeping your mouth shut. Even if you are in the pits of despair and ready to attempt bungy jump from KLCC with a raffia string as a safety device, you smile bravely and reply with a non commited "I'm fine" . Anything more than "I'm fine" requires more brainpower, more attention and yes, more commitment. And frankly put, most people would rather you giving that answer than anything more than that. Not that most people give a fuck anyway.

This holds true to me most of the time. I am always ready with the answer "I'm fine" when people ask me, complete with a wide brave smile. It doesnt matter if I wanna kill myself at the moment, I will always tell you I am fine. I'm fine now.I think. Not.

Pardon me for my lack of trust. Perhaps I am a pessimist who is better at lying than the rest. I will always tell you that the glass is half full... well, because that's what you want me to tell you anyway right?

I woke up this rainy morning.
Sat through a four hour long, non-stop lecture.
I listened.
I copied.
I smiled.
I joked.
I laughed.
I acted everything is alright.

when
I felt like an emotional mess.
I feel so sick with myself.
And I am certain I am sick now. (physically)

I couldnt take it anymore and before I knew it, I went home to sleep.
I skipped tutorials to sleep.
I am the only moron who'd choose lectures over tutorials
When I woke up, I felt more tired before I slept.

On keeping my mouth shut. Yeah, I have learnt that keeping my mouth shut is far a better option then consulting in someone. Getting someone to listen to you needs TOTAL trust, commitment and faith. Truth is, I sometimes just find it too hard to be so committed. Heck,I cant even commit to myself sometimes.

So yeah, next time if you see me abruptly staring into space or at nothing at all/ giving you a cold shoulder/ suddenly become from loud>quiet, keep in mind that I am taking some time off to keep myself from falling into a thousand little pieces.

You know what. If I say anymore now, I might just regret it. I am fine really. Just go run along and continue with your life. I do not need your commitment. I just need somewhere to hack my thoughts into.

If I am scaring you, and you have suddenly have developed lifelong phobia of me and my blog, I offer my apologies. sorry. I am not that perfect barbie doll which you are so fond of. I might just be a chuckie doll afterall I am human, with emotions, motives, aspirations and hopes. I get emo sometimes.I know emo is not cool but its normal. Most of the time you just cant see it cause I am so good at pretending. After all, I've been pretending for years its almost second nature.

Again,if you think I am scaring you, I am sorry. Go run and play with your barbie dolls somewhere else ok?

I promise I will try to be better tomorrow.

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posted by hiddenmcky at 11:32 PM 2 comments

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Relieved, rejoicing yet reconsidering

Relieved


PASSED!!
Yes, I passed everything! Had to refresh the webpage twice to recomfirm my happiness. Oh yes bloody hell! I dont know how I made it with all the last minute cramming. And all the pontenging. And sleeping/talking/daydreaming in class. And neglecting my tutorial papers. Ok, forget history, the point is I PASSED everything.

Now pray all A's =P

Rejoicing
I got my new beloved piece of metal today (sony ericsson w800i) at an affordable price!! Thank god for mei wei's relative and that I had some leftover from my 6 months working stint


Isnt it an eye candy??

Reconsidering

Upon obtaining my results, Yes, I was elated. But somehow, I know I have not given it my all. I know I didnt. Yet, I passed. I dont know why, but all of a sudden, I feel extreamly guilty. Sheech, I dont understand myself at all.

Sure i passed everything. And sure, I find business administration ok. Yet, I do not have this drive to study. So far, I've been studying for the sake studying. Which unfortunately is all done at last minute. Perhaps this is because business studies wasnt even on my priority list until I was in form five.

These are what that was on my mind WAAAAY before business studies.

1) Vet
This was my first childhood dream. I love animals so it was a natural decision..Until my parents told me its unrealistic.

2) Doctor
A realistic childhood dream given up due to financial and time constrains. I am the eldest so sacrifices must be made. Amazingly, most of my relative who havent seen me for years always assume that I am currently studying doctoring.

3) Phyciatrist
This went on for a few years. But I wasnt as serious about this as the above two.

Other things I had considered=
advertising, graphic design,like sketching journalism love writing and public relations dropped it since I decided I used to have this unique ability to say the perfectly wrong things at the perfect time, thus pissing people off sometimes. I think I am better at keeping my mouth shut now. I think.

Somehow, I cant keep myself from wondering, "How would I have flared if I had taken a different path?"

Would I have done well?
Would I have screwed up?

You know what, I think too much.
I am doing ok. Why am I still questioning myself?

posted by hiddenmcky at 11:48 PM 2 comments

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Malaysian Rap
Muar Mandarin

Sorry people of banana republic of malaysia. I suppose you have to have some basic understanding of mandarin and hokkien to understand this.

For those who are chinese educated, partially chinese educated, or somehow managed to understand a smattering of chinese, check out the lyrics! mind the profanity It does make sense and yes, it is hilarious! full use of malaysian street language

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posted by hiddenmcky at 11:05 AM 1 comments

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Praise me. NOT

People are funny creatures. We love being praised, yet we pretend its a disgraceful. Cant blame us,most of us with chinese upbringing have parents telling us to practice humility to the max and never ever in any circumstances, accept praise.

Dont get me wrong. I think humility is a great characteristic in a person as I think people who are too full of themselves are just so overbearing and ever oh so in your face. You just cant breathe beside them. The conversations you have with them is like an never ending self promoting commercial that is stuck in the "replay" button.

Then there are also some sad fucks whose mouths are so dripping with sarcasm that they find it hard to say even a SINGLE good thing about a person. Nothing people do is ever good enough for them. Even if you did a david blaine and made a whole herd of rampaging elephants dissappear in front of them, all they will say is "not bad". wtfness.

Then there are some people who praise halfway then decides that it is simply too generous to offer a full praise. So they add a "but.." in the end. Great! So whats the whole point of praising?! The person in question just ended up getting 'shot' in the end anyway!!

IS IT SO HARD TO SAY SOMETHING GOOD ABOUT SOMEONE?

I may be sarcastic at times. Yet, I believe in praising one when they truly deserves it. And most of the time,I actually mean what I say. I dont praise for the sake of it. Nothing pretencious, I am not some sad piece of existence who derives great satisfaction from shining someone else's shoe. I'd rather be picking coconuts for a living then to sink to such a level.

Praising should be done in a way which is genuine and simple. Overdoing it may cause head to swell to the size and the lightness of a beachball. Leave the fear of praising to the selfish insecure fucks. I think we are all made of better stuff to know better yeah?

So, please praise someone today if they deserves it.

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posted by hiddenmcky at 11:50 PM 0 comments

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Signs and their hidden meanings

Saw this somewhere sometime ago while randomly surfing some website.

Creativity rocks man, and stop pretending that you find it disgusting you so called pious beings. I know you find it funny. For your information, this not perverted. This is what angelin calls matured adult thinking.

Little kids go play far far with your masak masak sets ok??


I'll never see roadsigns the same way again EVER

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posted by hiddenmcky at 4:26 PM 2 comments

Saturday, March 10, 2007

TAGGed
by Aimee.Written by Mei Kay.

1. Never in my life have I: been... well alot of things actually. Botak. Cried during an injection (even as a child). The endless list goes on.

2. The last person I kicked was: I dont kick people.

3. People who drive me nuts: People who think they know more things about you then yourself.

4. The school I go to is: crowded. VERY CROWDED.

5. When I'm nervous: I speak very VERY fast while looking everywhere. Either that,or I become deadly silent. Depends depends.

6. The last time I laughed: Just now. Playing with my friend's little brat of a nephew. He is so goddamn adorable dammit. He wanted to call super man to beat my other friend up. 0.o Besides, he told my friend to throw his little brother in the rubbish bin. HAHAHA SO EVIL!!!AND HE IS THREE ONLY!

7. My hair is: short! and I want it long again!!!

8. When I was 5: I knew most of the cantonese swear words there was to know. Courtesy of my grandmother.

9. I love eating: delicious food. =)

10. When I turn my head to the right, I see: a yellow wall.

11. When I close my eyes, I see: My pillow. Sleepy...had one and a half hours of sleep nya.

12. When I look down, I see: Pants. White short pants. -.-'

13. Hello, I am: Mei Kay.

14. Hello, I am not: going to bother telling you what I am not considering you'd probably rather die from being rammed down by an unattended baby pram than to have me put you in the situation to read all the things I am not. =)

15. I love: anything and anyone that makes me happy.

16. I had a hard time understanding: Why the School of arts and science's(SAS) office isnt in the SAS block.

17. One time at a family gathering: I ate so much that I cant get off the sofa for several hours.

18. You know Beyonce, she: has a pretty name to go with a pretty voice.

19. Take my advice: Sleeping is irrelevant when you are having fun.

20. My ideal breakfast: Traditional toasted bread with kaya and butter. Or half boiled eggs. =)

21. If you visit the place I grew up: You'd probably wonder how I passed my time.

22. I would like to go to: sleep. Not now. But later. Which should be pretty soon.

23. Hershey's are: nowhere compared to cadbury.

24. My cell phone: Doesnt belong to me.

25. Nokia: is expensive but good.

26. My favourite person in Manhunt: None. I dont watch that show. I think its the most horrible thing to happen to us since Baywatch.

27. The animals I would like to see flying, besides birds: None. Cause I dont fancy planes crashes happening because a herd of rampaging flying hippos rammed into the plane in mid-flight. 0.o!

28. Last night: I stayed over at a friend's house in kuala selangor. Slept less than 2 hrs due to keh poh chee reasons.

29. My birthday is: a day when my mother had to go through agonizing 8 hours to bring me to this world. The day my mom and dad became parents. The day my grandma became a grandmother. The day I was born. DUH.

30. Tomorrow I am: going to tie up all the loose knots so I can face next week well.

tag;
mandy, yvonne, and whoever who wanna do this la

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posted by hiddenmcky at 10:02 PM 1 comments

Wednesday, March 07, 2007


Living up to expectations

Expectations. Life is full of it. You set expectations for yourself, your loved ones, your friends and yes, perhaps even your ever adorable four legged furry loyal friend.

The difference is the level of expectation varies to different indivuals.
Set the expectation too high, be ready to be dissapointed.
Set it too low, you'd be insulting yourself by the lack of faith you have in yourself.

Vice versa, this also applies as to other people as they also have expectations for you to live up to. After you managed to live up to that expectation, they expect even more from you. The vicious chain just continues... leaving you feeling tired and totally consumed by the fear of making people lose the faith they had built in you.

You fear to dissapoint them
By doing so you feel so useless,so unrealiable.
However this is secondary to dissapointing ourselves.

How can it happen when you feel dissapointed with yourself when people feel quite happy enough with what you did?

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posted by hiddenmcky at 11:33 PM 0 comments

Saturday, March 03, 2007

YES! A very short entry from me!

All the merajuking in the world couldnt get me outta attending my sister's anugerah cemerlang this morning.

When mom gets insistant,I know better than to cross her.

So dragged myself outta bed at an ungodly hour of 7.20 am. that itself is a CRIME ok?

She scored 6As and 1B btw. Congrats bugger, dont be so sad the cheapskate school didnt give you any ganjaran ok? If not happy, transfer je la! =)

Upon entering her school gates, I was greeted with THIS.


In a desperate attempt to get students to go to school, school authorities turn to the power of self-praise. Ingenious.

Perhaps if we had this in our old school instead of K.K Chan's manila cards and his whistle, perhaps I would attend school more often.

But then again, perhaps I wont.

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posted by hiddenmcky at 6:16 PM 5 comments

Friday, March 02, 2007



Why Blog?

People always ask me: "Why do you write so much in your blog?"
Or "Why start a blog? No privacy?"
or "You write ALL that yourself?"
or'Where you find so much time?"
Or "Bloggers are attention seeking"

AND ETC
Okay, one at a time.

Point ONE:Blogging is oftentimes viewed as an abnoxious way of self promotion.

Ok. This is the normal assumption of most people. After all, after all that camwhoring on xiaxue, you'd think most people are so in love with themselves. But then, how do you explain friendster? Isnt that the same? And people DO NOT comdemn friendster. Why condemn bloggers?

KNNCCB! People! Get your facts right before shooting people can?

Point Two: By blogging, you lack privacy

PRIVACY? What is privacy? To show kissy pictures of coupledom in friendster? To make out in public? Have happy hours in the back seat of your car in a parking lot? Tesco klang-check it out. Or best still, shoot a sex video like paris hilton and to have it distributed on internet?

Besides, you neednt pour out every single thought that runs through your head, every single bullshit you do everyday, every single picture you took from every imaginable angle, every single person you screw... Just fragments of your thoughts. No one is THAT interested in knowing what color underwear you are wearing today anyway.

Point three: Bloggers are a attention seeking bunch

AND you arent? So those 867453 pictures at friendster means nothing at all?
Or you want my grandma to teach you what paiseh means?

Besides, what is so wrong with attention? From young, we seek attention from our parents. Always vying to be the perfect son/daughther of their dreams. Then we seek attention to be noticed by our favourite teachers by scoring unbelievable amount of As. All for what? ATTENTION. When we make presentations, we seek attention of our fellow coursemates to score. When we work, we seek the boss's attention so we'd have a nice fat paycheck with a sexy secretary to help you. We seek the attention of the gorgeous creation opposite you so that they'd notice you, despite you know you dont stand a chance. Admit it, attention seeking is normal. No reason to fucking pretend.

God created us as individuals. Blogging shows individualism. Thus by blogging, you are abiding by the laws of nature. That is to be an individual.
haha! I am so vicious. God's name also come out. Thank god I am not on any debate team

Point four: Online personalities contradict with real personlities

For some, yeah. For myself, I am not sure.

People arent like books which you can read. The closest thing you can get to that is to read their blogs. =p
But in the end, we might just get more confused right?

Other things
Yes, I write everything you see here.

Sometimes, it takes awhile to write a post sometimes very fast.

I do not have so much time. I FIND time. Its so simple really. Some people just like to over exaggerate their busy-ness. We arent THAT busy really if we find time.

How i find so many things to write?
I dont know. Seriously.
I am seriously baffled.

I am baffled now by how did this short post ended up so long??
I should exercise some self control when typing.

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posted by hiddenmcky at 1:13 AM 0 comments