A guide to spotting a bimbo blog.

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I had been a serious girl lately. A very serious girl. Seriously.

Sorry for the constant airing of one woman soap operas. one woman 500 episode taiwanese hokkien drama. You get it. Nuff about me. Today, Im gonna indulge myself in poking fun at bimbo blogs :)

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1. Camwhores with everything.

Fact of life #1:
All girls camwhore. If a girl tells you she doesnt camwhore, she is lying.

Fact of life #2:
All guys watch porn. If a guy tells you he has never watched porn, he is lying too.

Fact of life #3:
Actually alot of people camwhores and had at some point-watched porn. So what? Which brings us to fact of life #4.

Fact of life #4: Everyone lies. - quote Dr House

....

But I am talking of people who camwhores all the time. Its as if its the only thing they do!!

In EVERY POST. From any angle. With any random animate/inanimate objects. Common victims of camwhores are

a)friends
b) boyfriend
c) soft toys/fruits like strawberry and cherries
(when friends and boyfriend get smart and refuse to indulge her).

2. Take pictures in dressing room

To show off their steals when they go shopping and post them online with taglines like "Uh I is fat. Arggghhh FAAAAT!! T.T"

caught!

Another fact: Girls will almost always say they are fat. No point arguing about this. If they argue ask them to please refer to fact of life #4.

3. Has a wishlist at the side of her blog.

Wishlist
*happy everyday~~~
*smiles and hugs and rainbows~~~
*shoess~~XD
*moneysssss~
*THE latest eyelash extension lash curler. In black and white!~~
*sony ericsson shake phone~
*credit card that cant be maxed~~
*dell inspiron and ipod in HOT PINK!~
*shoes~~
*gladiator shoes omgomgomgsh~~~
*Merc 5 series~~~
*lose 5 kg~~~ ;)

(Normally darn colorful one)

Uh okay. I understand women need loads of shoes.

Like THIS ONE :) wedges+gladiator themed
omgomgomgomg comfty and pretty can? The shoe fairy has been kind wtf.

Why? Cause we are silly as that. But what is the purpose of this wishlist? Do they think that people around them are secretly santa? Or Oprah? Or Dr Zetty?

Come to think of it, even they cant grant you "happy everyday and rainbows".
Want something real bad? Get a job.

4.Has a section dedicated to flaming people who dislike them.

Example:

If you dont like me. Dont visit my blog. I never ask you to read so dont tell me I am a self obsessed bitch you moronic piece of existence. Blah! My blog, if you dont like it-your problem. I'm not naturally pretty so I photoshop. I makeup. So what?! Which woman dont makeup and photoshop their pictures HUH?

If you have the guts leave a comment. I challenge you to! Or else the next time you stand up your balls will fall off, roll far far away and be eaten by a pack of starving hyenas. If you are a woman I hope your boobs sag like those tribal ladies in national geographic who has lived long enough to have seen the effects of gravity AND had breastfed 10 hungry kids. muahahaha. RAWRRR!!

Uh i believe in feminism and girl power and all that. But this kind of behavior is not liberating.. its. just. bitchy. Now go find some old bras to burn will ya? kthxbye.

5. Indulges in blog wars with other bimbo blog owners.

"I hate her she is so fake. fake hair. fake boobs. fake butt. fake accent. fake eyelashes. fake nose .fake smile. argh just so fakefakefakefake! She must be so ugly thats why only plastic surgery and thick thick make up can save her. Teeheheheheheh"

Xiaxue Vs Dawn Yang. Nuff said.

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I know. I am such a traitor to my own kind. Pfft.

Disclaimer: The wishlist and flaming section is written by me. If they horribly coincide with the contents of anyone's blog, I deeply express my sympathies and apologies. Again, I wish to clarify that all this is a product of my overactive imagination. Have a nice day.

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