Saturday, March 01, 2008
When the last train home leaves with your friend.
Just awhile ago, I was lying down on my bed staring away into the vast dark space in front of me. Trying figure out the faint outlines which come in various shades of gray and black. Actually it was pretty pointless considering all I can see is shapes with my naked unspectacled eye.
Yet this temporary blindness is kinda soothing and the bed was just nicely warmed. The chilling atmosphere and the slow pitter patter of the rain adds to the effect. And the korean ballads which I stole from my sister soothes the soul despite me not understanding what each beautifully constructed note meant.
I didnt know how long I stared into the gray space just soaking in the music. For a short while I turned around and stared into that sotong sumbat kapas which I had received from my nineteenth birthday. And it stared back at me, smiling placidly, happy and contented as ever.
Despite myself, I found myself wondering why I seem to always seem to put myself in compromising positions. Like finding myself missing the last train home last night while wen li managed to somehow get in. The irony. I should have known that it was late. Then why the stupidity? It almost seemed like all the logic held in my head evaporated into space.
So I was stranded there for awhile. It was 11.30pm. Thankfully the happy wong couple (my classmates) saved me from the strangers who were probably wondering why this girl with luggage was kicking a pole with her heels in frustration while talking on her phone, as if she was demonstating against the fate that had befallen her. Gotta love them good people.
I wonder why I make such stupid decisions sometimes. Is it for the thrill? The euphoria and the high I get when I managed to beat the odds despite all that is against me? Sometimes all this risky decision pays off while sometimes they just flop like a mariah carey movie.
I've been considering so much recently that I am getting tired. To study or not? If so, where to study? When to study? The sum need to study? The overall reputation? The lecturers? How about campus life? And expenses incurred? And plotting ways to convince my mom that a college in a shopping mall is just a sad excuse for throwing money away. And I just realised that I do not like staying at home all that much anymore. I love my family. I do, but I seem to have almost gotten used to the luxury of running away to random places at really random hours without needing to explain anything much to anyone.
Yes, even if it meant missing the last train home.
Ps: I will update on kelantan/genting later. And I shall post the link to the pictures that I taken with my digicam later as well. Keep an eye on my msn msg. I think I might be going down with a fever soon.
I feel feverish now.
Just awhile ago, I was lying down on my bed staring away into the vast dark space in front of me. Trying figure out the faint outlines which come in various shades of gray and black. Actually it was pretty pointless considering all I can see is shapes with my naked unspectacled eye.
Yet this temporary blindness is kinda soothing and the bed was just nicely warmed. The chilling atmosphere and the slow pitter patter of the rain adds to the effect. And the korean ballads which I stole from my sister soothes the soul despite me not understanding what each beautifully constructed note meant.
I didnt know how long I stared into the gray space just soaking in the music. For a short while I turned around and stared into that sotong sumbat kapas which I had received from my nineteenth birthday. And it stared back at me, smiling placidly, happy and contented as ever.
Despite myself, I found myself wondering why I seem to always seem to put myself in compromising positions. Like finding myself missing the last train home last night while wen li managed to somehow get in. The irony. I should have known that it was late. Then why the stupidity? It almost seemed like all the logic held in my head evaporated into space.
So I was stranded there for awhile. It was 11.30pm. Thankfully the happy wong couple (my classmates) saved me from the strangers who were probably wondering why this girl with luggage was kicking a pole with her heels in frustration while talking on her phone, as if she was demonstating against the fate that had befallen her. Gotta love them good people.
I wonder why I make such stupid decisions sometimes. Is it for the thrill? The euphoria and the high I get when I managed to beat the odds despite all that is against me? Sometimes all this risky decision pays off while sometimes they just flop like a mariah carey movie.
I've been considering so much recently that I am getting tired. To study or not? If so, where to study? When to study? The sum need to study? The overall reputation? The lecturers? How about campus life? And expenses incurred? And plotting ways to convince my mom that a college in a shopping mall is just a sad excuse for throwing money away. And I just realised that I do not like staying at home all that much anymore. I love my family. I do, but I seem to have almost gotten used to the luxury of running away to random places at really random hours without needing to explain anything much to anyone.
Yes, even if it meant missing the last train home.
Ps: I will update on kelantan/genting later. And I shall post the link to the pictures that I taken with my digicam later as well. Keep an eye on my msn msg. I think I might be going down with a fever soon.
I feel feverish now.
posted by hiddenmcky at 9:09 PM
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